mood: good (chang drunk dialed me last night and it was brilliant - i loved it!)
music: death cab for cutie - death of an interior decorator

somewhere along the line i was alerted to the fact that valentine's day is on monday. had i actually forgotten that it was coming? oh yes. i have repressed this holiday so far into my subconcious that i have no functioning memory of what i have done on valentine's days past. with the exception of the party i had junior year when no couples were allowed to come and we posted a sign on the front door as a directive to adam rowings which read, "no guitars permitted beyond this point."

i don't want this holiday. i don't want it at all. can't we just skip all the bullshit? i've never had a legitimate valentine in the past, i don't have one now, and i lack the energy to seek one out. and all the confusion (which some of you may be aware of) of the past couple of weeks isn't making anything easier. so why can't we just call it February 14th this year? i've given up on the whole damn thing. i don't even want it around for the sake of pouting and bemoaning my woeful state of affairs. and you know that's sad if i'm not even interested in complaining about it...

so either someone's going to have to be my valentine and say/do something extraordinarliy wonderful, or i'm not going to even acknowledge the day's existence god damnit. and if i should see any pda on campus...i might just set someone on fire...and not in the good way.

on the positive side, i'm going to go get drunk as shit at jill's anti-valentine's day party.
and dance my ass off.
and probably make out with someone.




so maybe it's not so bad after all.